Hidden at the back of the Cowgate, Bertie's is one of your typical 'end of the night' cheesy clubs.

If you get there pretty early then grab the comfy leather sofas at the door away from the bar. Perfect for crashing out on after strutting your funky stuff on the dance floor to the likes of No diggidy or the latest Christina number. As a music snob and a great hater of cheesy music the DJ does play the better end of the cheesy scale. Or request your favorite song or shout on the blackboard opposite the DJ booth.

Most nights they offer great drinks promotions. Their offer of '3 for 2' was the cause of my 21 Morgans in about 5 hours, first time I ever needed a tray for my drinks alone. Dance floor is pretty small at the back of the room with a huge mirror covering the wall. Pretty entertaining watching people walk into it. Beware of the dodgy slippery stairs down to the toilets where Banjo and I tobogganed down one evening - not a good look!

License	3AM
Dress Code	Whatever you fancy, if you are there earlier enough I don't think they mind trainers.
Toilets	Basic but have enough room to catch up with the latest gossip, normally pretty tidy and usual end of night mess.
Staff	Efficient and friendly.
Security	There when you need them and will even throw strange people away from your seat if you have sat there all night (nice one).
Price	£ Fantastic offers.
Totty	Mostly students and the under 25's!

Where it all began ... a fabulous place with the best staff. Ok, not so good since I left but it still has a bit of character (how the f**k would I know? I left the country when I left Bissets but I'm sure John hasn't f**ked it up) but I'm sure it is still a cool place except on Thursdays. Go once then you'll understand this is everyone's first place and is like Cheers without the good staff and fun. Another pub I love and can not give lower than 1/5 only kidding the birth place of KIDDA! Good on you Gullane!